This was the least ridiculous of the photos

Dear Someone,
We’ve never met and I have no idea who you are but today I wronged you and it is going to effect us both. I took something of yours, and now I have no way of giving it back.
Let me just say this was not my plan. I was forced into a shopping mall to help my father find new shoes(because the man is hopeless without me), and it was on my way out towards freedom that I saw your glasses. They were lounging on the table, peeking out of their green leather case, next to the folded up World News section of the Globe. The mall was closing, and my intention was to turn them in, but as soon as the case was in my hands it was no good. They were mine.
In retrospect, I feel guilty, but only because I wish I could have found you. We seem to have some things in common. Your glasses tell me that you must be an old man, , people tell me I’m an old lady in disguise sometimes. We don’t have this in common but you are practically fucking blind (I cannot keep your glasses on for more than a few seconds or I go cross-eyed and get a splitting headache). The newspaper laid out in the middle of a mall, you must have been reading instead of shopping which means you must have hated it there as much as I did. We could have talked and watched obnoxious teenagers go byOurs would have been the perfect friendship, I’ve laid the whole scenario out in my mind. Our shared love of the same music and the color green, and sweaters. Oh why did I have to go and steal your glasses? Bah, such is life.
I am sorry old man that these things could never come to pass, but I have your spectacles and I will cherish them always.


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