Things my mother says to me.

“You’re right, you should never have a baby because they just die.”

Today was hard. I went to see my mother at the rehab facility and we talked about birds and babies and her impending doom. She has short hair and soft skin and she smells like baby powder. She will become part of the earth again and we can’t decide where to put her ashes.

I told her I would take them to get ice cream.

I told her I would learn to garden. I told her she looked like a baby bird with her fluff of hair. She told me her stomache was hurting again and then she told me to leave.

Every morning I watch my face thin out and I look more and more like her. I guess someday I will be swollen and sick and look like a baby bird. Then I will just die.


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