Dear Universe, I don’t understand what you’re trying to pull here.

So Saturday I was at work and the day was going really well. I had gone out for dinner at Lumiere the night before with Sweet Pea so I could check out the super cute bartender(Who I am almost certain was flirting with me).

Anyways, Saturday,  it is about 11:30 and I look at the clock and realize that even though it’s a Saturday I am probably going to get out of work on time. Amazing.

This sends me off on a mental tangent of thinking about just how happy I am. The first trimester is over, I have a couch, I have my life under control, I have this great guy in my life. The last thing I was thinking about was how happy I was.

Evidently my body rejected the joy.

Next thing I know I am opening my eyes to Mark (my manager’s) face. I look up and Sweet Pea is sobbing by my work table. I had no idea what was going on. I was covered in blood, and buttercream. I knew something had happened but I had no idea what. Everyone was yelling at me not to move. I was terrified.

In the ambulance, I still didn’t understand what had happened. I was yelling at the EMTs “I have to go back to work! Its THANKSGIVING WEEK!
They told me Jen was with me, which calmed me down. They told me I had a seizure.

I got to the hospital and my dad met us in the emergency room. I wasn’t really grasping the situation. I kept cracking jokes. I was really mad at the bandage they had wrapped around my head, I looked like a WWI vet. The gauze went all around my head and under my chin and was soaked with blood. They left room for my pigtails to stick out. Hilarious and embarrassing but mostly just hilarious.
The truth is I was panicking, I needed Adam to get there. I just knew that when he did I would be OK. So I am sitting in the emergency room crying and laughing and waiting and waiting for him to get there.

Luckily Sweet Pea was there to keep me company but I don’t think she is particularly used to this sort of thing so she seemed a bit shocked. My Dad on the other hand is totally jaded to the whole medical-crisis routine and began talking about pie. He spent 20 minutes (while I cried) debating what flavor of pie to order for Thanksgiving.

So when Adam finally arrives everything just suddenly seems like it is going to be OK. For the first time I cried in front of him. Somewhere during the whole “Oh my god I almost died” mantra that was cycling through my mind I realized that I am stupidly, shamelessly, completely in love with him.

This is nothing like the whole incident that occured the other week where he made my bed and it made me so happy I accidentally told him I love him and then took it back via text message because I am quite possibly the most insensitive defensive bitch in the world. This is more something I had been thinking about all morning that was confirmed somewhere while I was tied down in an ambulance being pierced with needles and repeatedly yelled at not to move. Ah, the romance.

So he spent the next few nights with me at the hospital. At one point, he is lying next to me on my hospital bed and I just say,
“So I’ve been thinking because of this whole “I almost died” thing that has been going on that just in case anything happens I want you to know that I love you.”

I really have a way with words sometimes.

Anyways, The Universe seems to have misinterpreted some of my requests so I’m going to revise them again.

Dear Universe,
I would like to live the rest of my life without ever having another seizure. If you could also get rid of all my other major health problems that would be lovely too. I was actually thinking about how fantastic a job you were doing when I was suddenly smited. Also, If I could lose 10 pounds that would be great.