The rare moments when I am having a hard time talking about something everything in my body shuts down. I don’t know how to talk to him anymore. I feel myself closing off.

Yesterday I passed out in Adam’s shower and had to call for his help. For a girl who tries incredibly hard to be low-maintenance,  I take a lot of effort just to keep alive. I’m tired all the time. My elbows hurts from when I fainted.

Something just doesn’t feel right and I got sick of trying to figure it out so I have just distanced myself from the problem. I don’t have the energy to focus on any emotion other than being happy, I refuse to.

I know everybody thinks new year’s resolutions are stupid but I have a lot of them that I will post about soon. The whole idea is pretty exciting for me. If they go nearly as well as my year-of-happy goals did, I’ll be set.